DirecTV Merges with AT&T, Satan

In a move that has stunned customers and industry insiders alike, DirecTV recently completed a three-way merger, combining forces with both AT&T and Satan. The transaction appears to be the final piece in DirecTV’s plans to ruin the fucking lives of anybody looking to enjoy their services. “It’s really exciting,” says DirecTV Associate Director of Customer Service, Paul Otis. “Our ability to completely demoralize and … Continue reading DirecTV Merges with AT&T, Satan